How to be a Psychopath - chapter 9 - narcissism
***narcissism***
The last word must be left for narcissism. Chapter three told you how to activate the tools that enable narcissism. This chapter will tell you why you must look and what to look for in the mirror. First, potential psychopaths must understand that well-adjusted personalities receive reflections from society too. But it is data that is filtered differently. The budding psychopath must learn, as discussed in chapter one, to value social viability with the exclusion of all other intentions. The well-adjusted personality will seek a reflection from society that enables their social viability towards the bolstering of community; it is sophisticated. But reasonably well-adjusted people are less aware of the need they have to receive this reflection. The psychopath must be fully aware and hungry to receive a reflection from society, and be willing to distort the source of the reflection accordingly; obsessions will emerge that will lead to the manipulation of others. The psychopath must dumb down the reflection society gives them; society must be, for the psychopath, what a hall-of-mirrors is for a child. However, the psychopath must believe the hall is full of magic mirrors; the mirrors can be tricked or manipulated in a way that gives the psychopath the reflection they are seeking.
Do not read: Reasonably well-adjusted people are, for the psychopath, a sounding-board. They exist to provide substantiation; the concept the psychopath has of themselves must be maintained. Accordingly, the psychopath will manipulate the people around them to provide a distorted reflection. The ability we all possess to receive a reflection from others helps inform our sense of self, that then can be adjusted towards a fulfilling social existence. The psychopath hijacks this ability and reverse engineers the reflection; they learn to change the source of the reflection, not to learn from it. You will know if you are the source of a reflection being manipulated by a psychopath because they will make you feel inadequate, constantly. They must make you feel inadequate because the image you are reflecting back is incomplete. This is because the image they are projecting is not complete. The incompleteness of their self then becomes a problem they attribute to the character of the reflective surface. You are the reflective surface; this is not easy to conceive because in the process of providing a reflection reasonably well-adjusted people are also seeking it. It is true however, the psychopath is look deep into you to see, of them-selves, that which they seek for their self.
The narcissist must learn to believe that the incomplete image of themselves they receive from society is a faltering of society. However, the incompleteness is an inadequacy that begins and ends with the psychopath; this is a truth that must be ignored by the narcissist. Consequently, beginning psychopaths must let the feeling they have that the world around them is ‘wrong’ and they are ‘right’ become a dominate force. This will lead to powerful feelings of lack and dissatisfaction. The psychopath must then control, twist, trick, sway the people around them towards relieving this dissatisfaction. Many narcissists are very good at forcing others to help complete the incomplete image they project. In this way, beginning psychopaths must believe that external factors, such as other people, are the source of their feeling of lack. They must ignore the reality that their dissatisfaction springs from a hollow void within that will never be resolved.
The narcissist is not necessarily the body conscious individual, the fitness fanatic, the beauty therapist influencer, the tattooed, the injected, the liposuction-ed, nor are they necessarily the cosmetic surgery junkie. Having pride in your appearance, or experimenting, or crafting and creating your image is not the same as being narcissistic. The distinction is important because often, the true narcissist may be indistinguishable. Psychopaths must develop an obsession with substantiating a shallow self-concept. In other words, having pride or creative influence over your appearance is not the same as desperately seeking to define your-self. Expressing your search for self by making subtle or outlandish alterations to your appearance can be liberating and therefore, may aid a multidimensional and sophisticated self-definition. The emerging psychopath must accept an uncomplicated self-concept, like a caricature. The narcissist must accept their one-dimensional view of self as ‘complete’. Recall The Simpsons Movie, the 3D Homer is suddenly aware of his true proportions; this degree of self-awareness must be vigorously rejected by the manifesting psychopath. This is most easily achieved by ‘nesting’ in familiarity. The narcissist must learn to reject change and inconsistency. If they have learnt to be slothful, they must become committedly inactive, if they are high functioning they must be ruthlessly aspirational. Either way, their life concept must be driven by a desire to stabilise a concept of the nest; they are chicklings that failed to launch. They will call on others to help stabilise the nest’s foundation. Once the changeable nature of the world begins, inevitably to compromise the structure of the nest the narcissist will allocate blame; the people closest to them will be subject to accusation and suspicion.
Do not read: Why is narcissism such a potent word? So much so that it has become a spiteful term used to describe people who are self-obsessed. This is reasonable, of course, but may also lead to inaccurate labelling and exaggeration. It is important to remember that Narcissus, from which the word derives, suffered. He fell in love with his own reflection and perished in the act of its admiration. In other words, he never knew love. In other words, a true narcissist is blind. If you have a sense of being too self-involved you are not a narcissist. If you are self-involved and lack the ability to perceive your obsessive nature then you are a narcissist; and commonly, the self-obsession will cause physical damage or harm.
Narcissists are not necessarily concerned with the neatness of their clothes or the arrangement of their hair; they may not appear to be concerned for their outward appearance. However, vanity is an indicator, or symptoms, arguably of a narcissistic mindset. Most significantly, narcissist must become obsessive keepers of a narrative. Most reasonably well-adjusted people, have an unconscious sense of their story. They perceive themselves as a character that lives in a story, and the story consists of predictable and unpredictable elements. The character they are, however, is relatively stable. The narcissist, however, must make the story predictable; the sense they have of themselves as a character is flimsy. Narcissism is then less about maintaining an impeccable appearance and is more about maintaining a story that the character obsessively tries to control. For the narcissist, the construction must be reflective; they make a nest of mirrors. The midlife crisis syndrome is an example; external factors are controlled to help the character to define or redefine itself. Many reasonably well-adjusted people may enter a midlife crisis phase but will leave it again once the limits of the body become disconnected from the ageless bliss of a joyful mind.
The skinny: Potential narcissists must keep a close eye on their reflection. Not because it is alluring or appealing necessarily, but because it is unreliable. The image is eternally incomplete; the rendering, is therefore, a process that imprisons. The psychopath must develop their narcissism blindfolded; the incomplete nature of the image at the centre of it must be ignored. This will lead to obsession and hollowness, that can only be resolved by focusing on external factors. In this way, the narcissist must enslave others towards the substantiation of a story; this will lead to the burning of many bridges and loneliness. Pinocchio felt incomplete, in the process of fitting-in he learnt to lie, he become real once he understood the language of respect and truth. The psychopath must never move beyond puppet status; they must remain slaves to self, a self that is blind.
How to be a psychopath lesson 9: Fall obsessively in love with your reflection in the pond. Eventually you will dehydrate and perish, but don’t be distracted by the irony.
I hope you have been rewarded by How to be a Psychopath. I want the world to be a safer and less confusing place for my little girl. I have put all my brain power into Daughter Talk and the companion guide How to be a Psychopath. Please follow the links below to make a contribution to help me provide more demystification, ah-ah moments and many more true-words-written-in-jest. Thank you:
OR
Comments
Post a Comment